November 14, 2011

Children's Day & Violence Against Women




Just a day before children’s day, I read one of the most morbid news article ever.

The rate of rape in India has risen by 800% in the last decade. Not only rape, overall the incidence of violence against women is high – female infanticide and domestic violence to name some. As per the article, Indian men think they should not help their wives in the house, because its only the ‘women’s work’. They think their wives, daughters, sisters should dress the way they like, because otherwise they are just inviting trouble. They think they can beat up their wives because they don’t listen to them. They think they should kill their daughters because they are daughters.

Mostly they just want to teach women a lesson. Lesson for not listening to them.

The acts that comprise violence against women in India - female infanticide, domestic violence and rape, all seem to be an outcome of frustration that the men are facing in their own lives. Somehow there is a prevailing mentality that a woman deserves to be shown a place, a place below man.  

A majority of the male population do not think much of the women in their lives. Its perfectly fine if they check out other girls, commit adultery, wear whatever they want, and meet whoever they want and hang out wherever they want. If they don’t listen to their wife, its absolutely fine, that wife anyhow has no right over them because who is she, she is just a wife!

The crime rates indicate that:-

If a girl breaks up with a guy, the guy has every right to throw acid on her face and make her ugly for life or publicize the MMS he shot with her.
If a girl rejects a guy’s proposal he has every right to rape her.
If a girl wears short skirts or not, and returns home from work late at night, even her pick up and drop driver has every right to rape her and kill her after that.
If a girl appears in a MMS, is divorced or raped, every man has a right to laugh at her and call her a slut.

Is this what men should be? I think that somewhere, these men have learnt some really wrong lessons about the way they view women. Perhaps their parents were not able to instill the correct values in them, or perhaps their peers taught them that to be a man, you need to keep the women in your life under your heel. The most disturbing trend is that any no from a woman, is seen to be the spark that leads to the fire (crime against the woman in this case). Maybe its an issue of the so-called male ego as stated in the article, or maybe its that as a society, we are encouraging the growth of individuals who take sadistic pleasure in feeding on the helpless - women being the easier target, fulfill this need quite well.

I think its high time, families take responsibility for the way they are imparting values to their younger generations. One can imagine that for a son, a father will always be his first and maybe only role model. So if the father cannot respect his wife and resorts to domestic violence, we cannot expect the son to imbibe respect and love for womenkind.

This children's day, I hope that both parents - fathers and mothers alike, take a stand to teach better values to their children. To become good role models. To have a marriage devoid of distrust and violence and instead have an environment for mutual respect for each other. So that their kids see and understand that a man and woman compliment each other and each deserve love and respect.

5 comments:

  1. Too strong against men. Agreed bad things are happening to women by men but its not that they are the only victim, Men are after men too.
    Honestly your post is not on one thing, nor it separates one part from the other. the moral is blur, don't know what you expect and why.
    Also before going strong on something like this do think of many other things that you linked up for no reason. Better rewrite it in parts and highlight everything well.

    The article link inst working well. Do check before posting.

    Could have given a better detailed comment but prefer respecting your view here. keep up the good work

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  2. This post was based on the article, had checked the link but will see again and repost it. Mostly if you read the article, you will understand why this reaction. The point that I was trying to make is that there has been 800% growth of rape rate in the last decade. Such a growth for something as heinous as rape is not expected. Also, if you read the article, it states that overall crimes against women have increased in India. A major reason that they have cited is the mentality of men - if women wear certain set of clothes, the men think of it as an invitation and so on.

    So, there maybe mutiple reasons for why a major section of men think that its ok to abuse women this way. But the way I see it, its also to do with the fact that they themselves must be coming from families where respect for women is not taught to them at all. The idea behind linking it with children's day is that parents should bring up children who have such values in place and for children to have such values they must have the right environment at home which shows them that their dad respects their mom and vice versa.

    Will revise this post and post it again so that my point comes out in a more clear manner, as per your suggestion.

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  3. Hi, have updated the article with a new link. Also have revised the content, do let me know if its in a better mode now.

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  4. What you have mentioned here is a sad truth.. and we have bigger responsibility of teaching our children right and wrong.

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  5. @AT Hi, yes. I hope things change.

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